Thursday, August 13, 2009

I Pick Profesor Plum in the Garden with the Mower


Going to the mattresses
Taking it to the streets
Come out swinging

Say it the way you want but I have declared WAR on the person who mows our lawn.
This idiot recently murdered one (I'm thinking manslaughter) of my David Austen Roses by mowing over it. (Seriously? Its a BUSH!!)

But the rose is a fighter...and I respect that. It put up a new shoot and fought for new life. I then set out to give it all the attention it needed to get back to full strength. I played the diligent Florence Nightengale act by watering and feeding it as much as possible. It was doing great.

Then it was time to mow the lawn again.

I gave my husband one thing on his to-do list. MAKE SURE YOU INSTRUCT HIM TO STAY AWAY FROM ALL CULTIVATED PLANT LIFE. He was instructed to stay clear from my roses specifically. Last night I came home from seeing Julie @ Julia (one of my new favorite movies) and I saw my rose bush MURDERED again. This time it was first degree murder. A melt down quickly followed….

To use a reference from my favorite cult movie “Swingers”, IT'S ON my intelligence-challenged mower...IT'S SO ON....The alert level has been raised to red. Its now time for horticulture vigilantism. My top choices are: rocks around my roses, metal spikes pushed down so he can't see him, and firing him - always an option but not nearly as fun.

-- Post From My iPhone

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